Friday, April 29, 2011

Somehow the days pass

I'm finding each day so very hard. Every morning I am filled to overflowing with anxiety and I feel my heart break all over again.

My father's girlfriend moved out sometime early this morning. She didn't want us to come up and say goodbye to her, she wanted to be alone, leave quietly and shut the door on all the sadness.

We saw her yesterday and said our goodbyes, she of the stalwart, smiling face and me of the weeping mess.

She had grown to be a symbol for/facsimile of, my Dad to me the past six weeks and with her departure came the reality (once again) that my Dad is truly gone.

I do not know how people make it through such heartbreak.

And yet I also know that I have made it through myself before when my brother and mother passed away nine months apart. Something that I never thought I would get past, that the pain would never diminish, and somehow it did. I know it now.

So they must be right, that time heals. Broken hearts. Somehow.

I will try to hang onto that.


  1. yes, your heart will heal and he will be in your thoughts everyday. Don't be so hard on yourself.

  2. So sorry for your loss. It does take time. I always found sorry and joy mixed together. Joy in the memories and in knowing my loved one knew Jesus and sadness in missing their presence.

  3. Love to you Sally, and if I could I would give you many hugs.

  4. sending hugs and thoughts for better days, joyful memories and a gentle peace. your dad would certainly wish that for you too, sweet Sally.

  5. Hi Sally,
    Sends lots of love and hugs to you! I am wishing you the soonest end to your days of grief possible. This must be such a hard time.

  6. Dear Sally, I don't know why but it seems forever since I have visited your blog. I'm keeping you in my prayers and know the pain and hurt you are feeling! Hugs and blessings, Nan